is it just me?

...or is Adam Sandler starting to look a lot like Bob Dylan?

Perhaps it's just the hair.

how come I've never heard of this guy?

Oscar Micheaux

I was wandering around my twelve channels yesterday afternoon, the television a wasteland of dudely sports (golf, car racing, basketball, blah), and I ran across a short documentary on Oscar Micheaux, independent black filmmaker. The most prolific indie filmmaker of the early 20th century, who did everything from write the screenplay to casting, production, direction, distribution, and when he had to, town-to-town PR at each black theater. He produced a direct response to Griffiths' Birth of a Nation, the pro-Klan epic that is cited in nearly every film survey as the Great Birth of Cinema, though the racist narrative is usually glossed right over. He was one of the first directors to successfully jump from silents to talkies. The dude was a one-man movie industry.

How come I've never heard of this guy?

Oh, right: he was a black filmmaker. He made movies starring black people, for black people. Un-frackin-believable, the stuff that's buried skin-deep in this country.

media check

Just finished reading Straight Man by Richard Russo, a tale of dysfunctional academics. Am now embarking on Moo, by Jane Smiley, another slice of academic fiction.

The Devil Wears Prada was funny but I haven't quite gotten over Meryl Streep calling the waifish Anne Hathaway "the fat girl" because she's a size SIX. Still, Meryl Streep is genius and the clothes really are as gorgeous as the shoes are completely ludicrous. It's a wonder none of the actresses broke something during filming, every time I turned around Andy was running - RUNNING - in 4" stilettos.

And The Forty-Year-Old Virgin, I know I'm late to this party, but holy crap, that was funny. Despite a scene with gratuitous homophobia, which they could've done without ("I know you're gay because...," which I guess is the white-boy version of the dozens). And the ongoing kidding-on-the-square misogyny, wherein you can laugh at the dude for saying stupid sexist stuff, or you can laugh with him because you're a sexist dude, too. But I do have this to add to the plus column: the forty-year-old virgin falls in love with a forty-year-old woman. Possibly even 40-something. Oh yes, her stomach is impossibly flat for a woman who's had three children, but she's a natural-looking fortyish hot grandma. Catherine Keener really rocks that role. Steve Carell couldn't be any funnier.

New Gwen Stefani, The Sweet Escape = perfect workout music.

when silly movies attack

Tuesday: movie night chez the poet. He picks out two movies, assuming they are mindless entertainment.

One is Over the Hedge which is indeed cute animated fun with cartoon villains and a happy ending.

The other, alas, was The Break-Up which was marketed as a cute, funny, relationship comedy. No. Wrong. It was the worst year of my life, compressed into two hours. When I wasn't about to burst into tears, I was like a deer in headlights. There were two really funny moments, involving Jennifer Aniston's brother, but everything else was just not-funny. To add insult to injury, the ending was totally Hollywood bullshit.

Won't You Be My Neighbor?

YouTube - Won't You Be My Neighbor?

Do not miss this if you have ever seen an episode of Mr. Rogers. I grew up watching Mr. Rogers, as so many people have, and even today if I run across a rerun, he just makes me feel better.

He does a brilliant job of explaining why public television, why educational programming, why kids matter, why their feelings matter.

much has happened this last few weeks

1. I passed my dissertation defense. That would be DR. Jezebella to you.

2. Threw a wedding shower. It involved cooking for two days but was worth every moment. I think it was the honoree's public debut as bride-to-be and she enjoyed doing the Fun Bride Stuff without having to do any of the planning.

3. Slept for about a day and a half.



now, to much more serious business, I wish to make a few comments regarding the movie "Mystic River." Yes, it is dark and complex and beautifully acted, and tragic. It should've ended about 10 minutes earlier, however. Until the last two scenes, I hadn't really noticed the female characters. They were minor supporting roles, as the story was really about the male leads. Okay, fine. But then, when it comes time for them to step up, it's revolting. First Sean Penn's wife, Laura Linney, tells him that even though he has done a horrible thing - several of them - it's okay with her because, gah, I can hardly even think of it without gagging, "You're the King! You could rule this town!" "you are the king"?? Bog, who says that? "Honey, you just killed an innocent man but it's okay that you did it because you're the king. Let's fuck!" Revolting. As background noise, she was fine, but holy crap, this is not how women talk.

Second, the character played by Marcia Gay Harden. Her husband, a profoundly damaged man, has just been murdered by his childhood friend. First, Laura Linney dismisses her with a put-down about "what kind of woman thinks that about her own husband?" Well, everybody ELSE thought he killed the girl, why not her? And then there's the closing scene: a parade. Happy family one (Sean Penn's) is on the street. Happy Family Two (Kevin Bacon's), freshly reunited, also on the street. Then there's that pathetic widow, weakly Marcia Gay Harden, skulking around, embarrassed to exist, and the Happy Families ignore her, act like SHE is the embarrassment, not the murderer and his family. Not the cop who has chosen to cover up the murder, and his family. No, the widow, she's the one who shouldn't be there. It's revolting, it really is.

I have to wonder how Marcia Gay Harden could tolerate such a shit role - well, Laura Linney, too - how did they have the stomach to be so patently unlike actual women?

And so this is how the movie ends. Happy families, widow who obviously ought to disappear... all on a nice spring day. Because, really, wouldn't the neighborhood be nicer if that widow, who reminds us of, you know, icky things, would have the decency to just disappear? Nobody wants to see a woman without a man.

Then the credits roll, I see "Written by Clint Eastwood" and I figure it out: he's never actually listened to a woman in his life. He knows how men talk - and he's good at writing them - but he only knows how to write what he wants women to say. As in, "You're the king." Who says that shit, for reals? Go figure, a 70 year old guy never heard a woman speak - not really - in all his life. It shows in his writing.

So anyway what these last two scenes do is completely wreck and ruin what had been a really good, powerful, complex movie. Sure, it was about men (what isn't?) but until then the female characters were at least inoffensive.

In conclusion: anyone wishing to rent this movie is advised to TURN IT OFF as soon as Laura Linney starts smarming all over Sean Penn in the bedroom after he confesses to her. No good will come of watching the rest.

The Crass Picture Show

The Crass Picture Show

In addition to Ms. Mentor, I also love Miss Manners. And I am sick and bloody tired of spending many dollars on a movie experience, only to have morons piss me off. If they're not text-messaging, they're actually talking on the phone. If they're not talking out loud, they're whispering. I particularly hate it when a couple is nearby and the man takes it upon himself to Explain the Movie to his date, who no doubt would be capable of understanding what was happening if he WOULD ONLY JUST SHUT UP for a minute. This happens a lot at sci/fi and fantasy movies, because, you know, science fiction is so Manly and Complicated, no mere girl could possibly understand what is happening.

example: I went to see Pride & Prejudice recently in Pensacola. It is a quiet, subtle movie, and definitely for grownups. A man down the row from me talked in his wife's ear throughout the movie. I mean, a running commentary. In a speaking voice, not a whisper, and he had a deep voice, so the rumble carried over to me. I shushed several times but to no avail. After the movie I stood up, looked at him and said "was that you talking through the whole movie? Maybe you should not talk during movies any more." And his WIFE apologized. Not him, his wife. I'm sure she has learned to tune him out, but for the love of bog, shut up in the movie theater, and talk about it later!! Why bother to pay the prices to see a movie in the theater if you're not going to pay attention to it?

My other recent movie irritation was the woman who said, when I asked her child (very politely) to please not talk during the movie, the mother said "He's talking to me!". Well, so? You should both shut up! Jeebus. He was old enough to understand it, and if he can't sit still and be quiet for 2 hours, she should wait for the movie to be out on video.

Well, and then there are the people who bring very small children to adult movies with scary stuff in them. No two-year-old needs to be in a movie theater watching a PG movie, ever. I expect childish noise at a G-rated kid movie, but not at anything more mature. Do these people not have babysitters? Can they not trade babysitting with friends & family if they can't afford to pay a babysitter?

Sigh. If I'm going to spend twenty bucks, I just want a nice peaceful movie experience, so I can lose myself in the action and not be constantly pulled out of it by rudeness around me. I have a friend who always has to sit in the back row, far away from everybody, so she doesn't end up in a fist fight with some rude bastard.

Miss Manners is right: they need to hire ushers who can boot people out when they're being rude.