the litter in new york city

As previously noted, I was in New York City a few weeks ago, and let me tell you what I mostly remember about the city itself, besides the freezing-ass cold: those fucking Norbit movie ads. I was going to grab one off the web and put it in this post, but you know what? I can't stand looking at it another second. They were on bus shelters, taxicabs, billboards, draped ten stories high on buildings. Eddie Murphy in fat drag lying on top of Eddie Murphy in man drag, with the tagline "Have you ever made a really big mistake?"

God forbid anyone should accidentally fuck a fat girl.

This is the subtext of that nasty poster:

"Oops, it was an accident! I was just walking down the street minding my own business, and suddenly! SUDDENLY!! I was alone, naked, with a fat woman, putting my dick in her, over and over again! I have no idea how this happened. I would never admit to having gone to any trouble to do this, because everybody knows, you don't have to make any kind of effort to fuck a fat girl! No! They are grateful and desperate and given half a chance, will carry your narrow ass up the stairs, into the bedroom, and fuck you! I swear, I didn't mean to! I'm not ATTRACTED to fat girls! Ha! Like that would ever happen! Nobody likes fat people! NOBODY! Also, if you fuck a fat girl, she will suddenly be desperately in love with you and chase you all over the place, to hilarious effect, in slapstick fashion, while wearing absurd clothing."

You know, I haven't seen this movie. I don't need to. Nobody does.

Hollywood knows: There's nothing funnier than a fat girl in a nightie, unless it's that same fat girl in a nightie chasing a skinny guy. Ask that woman from the Parkers. Monique is her name, I think? She's making bank off working the stereotype, and of course doing her sisters no damn favors.

I bet I know why Eddie Murphy has to play the fat lady in Norbit. I bet even Monique wouldn't take on such a degrading role, and she has displayed a real willingness to take it on the chin for a paycheck.

I wonder how Eddie's fat black sisters feel about this nasty movie. I wonder how his brothers (fat or thin) with fat wives, girlfriends, mothers, sisters feel about it. I can imagine the brothers, being as dudely as white boys, not seeing Eddie's hateful "comedy" as offensive because, dude, you know, it's just a movie, right? But in black America, fat women are far less offensive to the overall community than fat white women are. So why is he making millions off this premise?

I wonder: This misogynistic movie, making millions and millions every day, does it even reflect black America, even though Eddie Murphy is black? His appeal has always crossed racial boundaries, I guess, and fat jokes, it turns out, are something we all have in common, white, black or brown. Well, in that case, what a great day for racial harmony in America, when whites and blacks alike can all point and laugh together at the very notion that someone, somewhere, might accidentally fuck a fat girl.