Sartorial Sundays: the ‘Slut-o-ween’ Report at I Blame The Patriarchy

Sartorial Sundays: the ‘Slut-o-ween’ Report at I Blame The Patriarchy

I saw this article on the Times and knew Twisty would handle it for us. She always does. I however am motivated to pontificate about Halloween costumes a bit more than is really necessary on someone else's blog. So here you have it:

Non-slutty costume recommendations that I have had success with in the past:

mongol horde.
pirate (not slutty pirate).
cleopatra (with date as Anubis).
Autumn personified.
my inner child.
Once my date and I went as Steve & Terry Irwin.

Primary considerations for a Halloween costume:

can you drink in it? without a straw? (full-head monster masks are RIGHT OUT)
can you go to the bathroom in it without assistance?
will you be able to use the bathroom alone once you are drunk?
are the shoes comfortable and safe? because, seriously, if you drink, you don't want to be wearing 4" platform mary janes.

These answers should all be YES. You can get to your cocktail, you can pee all on your own (like a big girl!), and you won't fall over and bust your ass because you are wearing ludicrous shoes.

The most important piece of Halloween advice, however, is this:

whatever else happens, don't drink whiskey through a straw.